I feel like abortions should bother me more
Even the bartender felt bad for me
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
