You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
