I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
