If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
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