she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
