Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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