worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize