You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
one two three fourrrrnication!
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
