Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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