oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
