The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
