listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize
