There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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