Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
