its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
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