David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize