I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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