I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
