So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Someone shattered a urinal.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
