Where did you get a picture of my penis
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
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