She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Randomize
