a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I had to cum in my sink.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
