You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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