Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Randomize