i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
