I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
50% drunk capacity currently
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
