I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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