we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
