i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize