Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I love having hate sex.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I think a kid would responsible me up
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
Randomize