Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
