i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
