so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
What a dumb baby whore.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
