bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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