I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
