We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
