I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Someone signed my nipple.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
