I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
