paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
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