It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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