I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
This beer is not sobering me up at all
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Randomize
