found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
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