Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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