Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
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