some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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