How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
We're not piercing ourselves today.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
