Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize