I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
