It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
i think i just lost a toe
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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