How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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