i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
